You must leave Delhi once, to value the rickety walls, crowded lanes and dirty marketplaces almost more than or equal to the overcast meadows and picturesque woods of East coast.
The dingy alleys proffers a lot of things, you don’t have to say yes to everything, which is where I think I went wrong.
Being responsible for your own misery is a privilege nobody wants to acknowledge, well at least no one else made your choices for you, and that is understood only when the beautiful east coast incarcerates you in the shackles that for loss of words masquerades as love and affection and devoids you of ability to make rational choices and you’re stuck being miserable because of some other person.
I had once “Changed” my lifestyle by shifting from Marlboro Advance to Ice Burst, which was not much liked by my throat, but my pocket remained filled with gratitude, and few more Gandhis. Though this time I decided to quit smoking altogether. Come to think of it, I had started smoking to overcome the anxiety issues I had back in July 2019, which become a pervasive theme of later 2019 and led to many eh again for the loss of words “fucking terrible” choices, which in turn led to some introspection and yada yada yada. All in all, haven’t smoked for 23 days so far!
The lazy brat was one of the most glorious and funny twitter profiles of all times, and these are not even my words, but honestly now, it doesn’t even matter. Entire social media will start acting like a bitch and show you the content that you’re running away from. Quitting social media was always on the chart, but just needed the push. I wish to preserve my sanity, at least for next 5 years, and this was a much needed break for the purpose. People tell me I’m acting on impulses, but this is the first time I ain’t being impulsive, it’s a well thought out exit strategy, pause for dramatic effect, to nowhere. See when you’ve got a screw loose, you’ve got a screw loose.
Drink water, with a squeezed lemon, and a pinch of salt, which, if you’re not trying to impress people with your word count could be called lemonade, first thing in the morning. The difference is not physical, or is too small to be noticed or felt, but phycological because you’re replacing it as a habit, with laying around in the bed, scrolling through someone’s twitter profile wondering if they actually did what they claim they did on Twitter.
Cook your own food, do your own laundry and clean your own toilet, to get a very little and subtle dose of sense of independence and accomplishment. It doesn’t do much in the longer run, just makes you a more bearable person and if you ever get stuck in a sinking ship, where most useless person is thrown off the board, you’d not be the one.
Drink water out of a glass instead of the bottle, and you’d be a happier person. Don’t trust me, do it for yourself.